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A Firm Foundation...
​The Pillars of My Coaching System:
Identity
What we believe about ourselves influences every aspect of our day to day living, our interactions with others, and how we present ourselves to the world. Self belief can have a significant impact on our happiness and success, not only in our personal life but also in our professional life and career. When a person has a strong self belief they are more likely to set challenging goals for themselves, to stand firm when tough seasons hit, and to identify and press forward to reach their goals. The opposite of a strong self belief is someone who is less likely to press forward when life gets challenging, they will often set goals that are easily reached and less ambitious. They are more likely to settle. Having a strong self belief and identity is an important key to gaining success in the personal, relational, and career areas of our lives.
Ask yourself:
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Do you know who you are as a person or do you feel lost in your identity?
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Is who you are something that you feel has changed and now do you feel the need to “find yourself” again?
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Do you have a core belief that is healthy and positive or is this belief something that is damaging to how you see yourself?
Relationships
Relationships, both personal and in our outer world, play a role in our happiness, how we are seen to others, success in our careers, and also how we perceive how well we are doing in our own lives. Healthy relationships can give us fulfillment, they can lead to opportunities, and can broaden our lives. Fostering healthy relationships usually involves effort, compassion and empathy because as life ebbs and flows so will the relationships, both personal and professional. In unhealthy relationships there is often conflict, and mistrust. This can show up in all areas of our lives. Learning to build healthy relationships will help you to be more successful and fulfilled in both your personal and professional life.
Ask yourself:
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Have you struggled maintaining relationships that encourage you and bring you joy?
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When you examine the relationships in your life do you feel that they tend to be more one sided?
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Are the relationships that you have full of conflict and chaos? Do you need to examine what ties may need to be cut?
Moral Compass
Belief system … What can you stand on and pull strength from, what comforts you in times of pain and stress? We each have our own personal journey when it comes to having faith and a belief system. This is usually where we draw from to keep us grounded…to set our own moral compass for how we treat others and for how we choose to live. Having faith in a higher being, believing in an all knowing entity, or maybe something you feel deep within, will give you purpose and comfort. When we don’t have faith in something, we tend to flounder, often we can’t seem to find purpose in our day to day living. Having a strong belief system in your life will help you in seasons of struggle. That belief system will guide you in your decision making, the way you treat others, and will help you to build a strong foundation in your life.
Ask yourself:
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Do you have a strong belief system in place but find that it conflicts with areas of your life?
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Did you grow up with little thought to believing in a higher being or purpose and now feel like you are unsettled or struggling to find meaning and purpose in your life?
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Do you feel a push/pull in your life that has you searching for more?
Daily Habits
Your daily habits are very telling. What we do with our time is in part the essence of determining our success. How we manage our daily habits, our time, and our resources can make all the difference in our day to day living. This structure can also determine how successful we are in our personal and professional lives. The person who manages their time wisely and who has built daily habits that reinforce their personal and professional goals, will find that at the end of the day they are less frustrated, more productive, and will often have a calendar that is clear and well planned. By not setting a daily agenda and having well planned habits that are built into our day, chaos and stress can take over the day.
Ask yourself:
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Do you need to set a more well rounded calendar for your day, and would you be more motivated if you had an agenda to follow? Would having a “Power Hour” built into your day allow you to focus on something you have been putting off that seems impossible to build time for?
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Would having better habits increase the odds of you getting things done? What gets in the way, both emotionally and physically, of setting habits that not only benefit you in your personal life but your professional career as well?
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Have you built into your day or week personal time that is just for you? How much less stressful would a busy week or day be if you knew that you could look forward to a block of time that is just for you?
Dreams & Goals
As you look back to your childhood, what big goals and dreams did you have for yourself? Children dream BIG! Somewhere in our lives though, we usually start settling and trimming down our goals and dreams because we lose that vision we had as children. We settle or become more conservative, speaking less to ourselves about what is possible and more to ourselves about what is practical. But those dreams and goals for our life are still there, buried deep within us! Can we rediscover those big audacious dreams again? Absolutely!!
Ask yourself:
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Are you feeling stuck in your life…like there must be something more for you?
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Have you found yourself thinking “I’m an adult but I don’t know what I want to be when I grow up!” or “I just don’t feel fulfilled anymore?"
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Are you just going through the motions of your life day to day?
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Are you “checking out” by doing mindless things like binge watching tv or maybe you find yourself eating or drinking to soothe your boredom?
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Are you finding yourself emotionally exhausted at the end of the day?
Healthy Boundaries
Having healthy boundaries is one of the most overlooked areas of our lives for most of us. Healthy boundaries with family, coworkers, friends, and even ourselves can make a difference in our emotional health, our physical health, and the environment we live in. Healthy boundaries can look like knowing when to say no, standing firm in the face of temptations, or not allowing others to force a “feeling” onto us. There are so many areas that healthy boundaries need to be in check. When we let those boundaries fall, we open ourselves up to internalizing criticism, anger from others, pressure and even negative self-talk or actions against ourselves personally. Healthy boundaries will allow us to have more self awareness, more courage to be yourself, and the ability to say no when needed without the guilt and shame that others may try to impose.
Ask yourself:
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How are you living in your “space”? Are you able to stand firm, can you say no to things that may not be serving you well?
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Did you grow up watching a parent or loved one fall victim to manipulation or coercion? You may not recognize what a healthy boundary is if you didn’t see it growing up.
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Does your professional life need a “boundary check-up”? The workplace is often an overlooked area that we need to be aware of keeping healthy boundaries in place.
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